some times, like now would be a good example, i wonder if i really am a born idiot. at times i'm doing stuff that's so stupid that it's annoying, not just to me, but to others as well. and it gets me all flustered. and nowadays, feeling like an idiot is a feeling i get all the time. BUT this is insignificant; why the hell am i sitting here just complaining about it? if i'm so hung up over this, how the hell would i be able to get over all those bigger problems in life? i'm a big boy now, it's time i grew up and solved my own problems. really, i'd rather be an idiot in order to not let feeling stupid get the better of me. some times, living up to social expectations isn't the number one priority. i gotta live life as it is, i don't care if certain people like during today give me the impression that i'm a nutcase. SO WHAT? I ALREADY KNOW I AM A NUTCASE. SO SHUT IT AND STOP GIVING ME THAT LOOK. don't tell me to change in order to live up to expectations because i say i like who i am as of now. and when i say i like who i am as of now, i mean i like who i am as of now. so, FEELING STUPID IS GOING DOWN. I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK, i don't like living to reach other people's expectations. i live for myself at the moment, and if i'm an idiot so be it, i'm an idiot.


now i gotta chiong homework. shit.